If I no longer want to reach for pain.

If I no longer want 
to teach through lack…
then how can I teach? 
I can reach into my own presence
with my child / my partner / myself. 
Back to myself 
because I teach / change / inspire through example. 

Do we teach our child
to say thank you 
for the meals their mother prepares? 
Do they know the whole process 
behind what’s on their plate? 
Were they at the store? 
Do they know where things are placed 
so they can be picked and put in the basket? 
Do they know how long their mom 
stands there and cooks? 
Have they tried it themselves? 

Does my husband say first: 
“Thank you, love,
for making our meal”? 
Yes. 
And then our son says it too. 
Even though he’s still little, 
he takes part in everything at home. 
He knows what’s in the fridge 
and where to find it. 
He knows how to clean, and he does it with us.
When something breaks – he repairs it 
with his dad. 
And then I come in and say: 
“Thank you, guys, thanks to you 
we have light again / our lamp works / we have warmth.” 
When our son gets upset 
because he can’t play with his dad as long as he wants, 
we tell him how much strength daddy needs 
to work all day, from morning till night. 
We show him what we have. 
What we’re able to buy because of it. 
What we can do together. 
We talk about it 
no matter what the topic is. 

We explain 
not in terms of sacrifice, 
but cause and effect – action and result. 
Because it’s not obvious that he knows. 
We know because of our life experience. 
He doesn’t. 
He’s the small one – 
unless we begin bringing him into life 
through stories, 
presence, 
shared action. 

I can also turn toward 
my own emotional presence. 
Children learn by watching. 
At home – who do they watch? 
Mom and Dad. 
I can learn gratitude myself, 
so I can later share it with him. 
When I live in a state of gratitude and appreciation – 
my child will grow in it too. 

How do we learn gratitude? 
Every time a thought comes in 
to complain or criticize: 
See it – Stop – Change it. 
Add something positive. 
Look for something true and kind. 
One sentence that lifts. 
Shift it. Replace it. 
When you build it in yourself –  
Your Child will have a new example to follow. 

This desire to find a new way – 
that’s a turning point in how we teach ourselves.
A generational step. 
No longer through pain. 
No longer through shame. 
No longer through lack.  
But through presence. 
Through inner work. 
Through recognizing emotions
and naming them. 

That’s what my mornings are for. 
(I wrote about them earlier.) 
Silence. 
Turning inward. 
Finding my own calm 
from the very beginning of the day. 

I started once too. 
And the results are inspiring 
for myself, 
and for my Family. 
And I wish the same for you. 
❤️
To live a better life.
One that becomes lighter. 
More free. 
More kind.